Wilma 01.09.12

Today was weigh in and it was NOT a good day. I ran out on my lunch hour to get weighed in because I didn't really see another time that would work for me this week. When I saw the number on the scale they might as well have told me I gained weight, I lost .6 - that's not good your first run out. I can only write about it now because I'm not as emotional about the defeat I felt when I saw that on the scale. I'm fully aware of all the reasons it could be only a half pound but frankly, none of them are good enough. I was so distraught when I left there that it took me almost 30min to just stop bawling about it. I couldn't even fully get myself together to go back into the office. I had to break away from my desk and run into the bathroom because I just couldn't stop crying about it. Even driving on the way home thinking about it made me well up with tears. I tried listening to upbeat music REALLY REALLY loud all the way home, with the windows rolled down for the fresh air to try to break the emotion but it wasn't working. When I finally did get home, I was hoping hubby would be up and wanting to go to the gym. He wasn't - it's cool - he works 3rd shift and depending how late he gets to bed when he comes home, he needs those additional hours of sleep. So I transferred some rocking music (incl Eminem, a new band (to me) Fitz and the Tantrums, Paper Tongues & O.A.R to name a few) to my iPod and headed to the gym. I walked on the treadmill for 45min - walked about 2.10 miles and worked out some of my frustrations. I feel better emotionally - I'm still mad about it and I went and got a pizza for dinner. I'm not giving up (yet) - however, if I don't see some sort of change in that scale in the next month, I might be cutting WW loose. I'm planning on doing my body rock tonight yet, but my legs are stiffening up a little so we'll have to see. Of course, Housewives is on so maybe I'll just put that on and chill. We'll see! - Wilma (tomorrow better be a better day...)